We’re so done with therapy.
We are so done with therapy.
Okay, don’t freak out. We love and support all therapists and think therapy is critically important for our generation to work through the youth mental health crisis. Just keep reading…
There’s more to the puzzle here. By the time we leave our therapeutic programs not gonna lie,we’re absolutely done with therapy. At least for the time being. We’ve just put in months, if not years, of intensive work, and we need a break.
It’s not just us former troubled teens. It’s not uncommon to meet our peers who were not in therapeutic programs but have been in therapy since before they can remember.
Experts have started to say we’re an over-therapatized generation. While many young people need therapy or even residential programs, Colin and me being two of them, isn’t the whole goal of treatment to internalize learnings, build resilience, and learn skills to take out to use on our own?
One in six US children aged between two and eight has a diagnosed mental, behavioral, or developmental disorder. Just 31% of U.S. adults considered their mental health “excellent” in 2022, down from 43% two decades earlier.
Even though more people than ever are going to therapy, trends are going in the wrong direction. This isn’t true for increased access to treatment for cancer, diabetes, heart disease, or almost any other area of medicine.
As someone who has gone to therapy regularly since leaving my residential treatment center, I use it to treat specific issues, not as a space to vent without trying to reach a solution. I use therapy to dive into childhood trauma or deeply ingrained patterns of behavior that continue to evolve. I rarely talk to my therapist about my day-to-day complaints.
Since 2002, the share of Americans getting mental health care has grown by 1/3rd; the share of those reporting "excellent" mental health has fallen by nearly as much
New articles and studies come out about the youth mental health crisis daily. Colin and I have seen a huge gap in the type of support available not just for those of us coming out of treatment, but for the majority of our peers when we were entering young adulthood. What we need is to learn real-world tools from people we trust to help us navigate the complicated reality of being young in today’s world. We want relatable mentorship and someone to hold us accountable.
Some of us might not trust teachers, parents, and therapists to help us in this area of our lives specifically*.* If you didn’t grow up with social media, school shootings, climate change anxiety, and deep political discord, it’s hard to put yourself in our shoes in some ways. It’s not a bad thing, it’s just our reality.
When I left treatment, and honestly even before I went, all I wanted a big sister to give me the “cheat codes” to get from A to B. Someone who I thought was cool and, therefore, someone I’d listen to.
Even though I didn’t exactly know what I wanted my life to look like, I wanted someone to show me how to be successful, confident, and well-liked, if I’m being honest. I wanted someone who is invested in my life, who I knew cared about me, and who could keep me accountable. I wanted someone in the real world who had my back and could walk the walk alongside me. Once-a-week therapy from someone in a completely different generation than me did not cut it.
As Colin says, “one good mentor can change the entire trajectory of your life.” We both were lucky enough to have mentors in our lives that were positive influences right after treatment.
But we’ve had many friends, both from treatment and our “normal” friends from college, pass away in their 20s due to mental health related issues like suicide and overdose. Most were in or had been in therapy. It’s clear that for some of us, something is missing from the clinical mental health treatments.
We’ve seen mentorship be crucial for us and our peers who have weathered the ups and downs of young adulthood.
We started Not Therapy to be the mentors we wish we had when we were our clients’ age. Mentorship goes beyond a once-a-week session. We not only help young people explore what a life would look like that they enjoy living, but we help them build it alongside them as we continue to build our own. We hold them accountable every step of the way, and we don’t just tell them what to do. We show them how to do it because we’ve had to - and still have to - do it for ourselves.
💌 Our message to parents is simple - support your child in finding someone who can be a positive influence in their life as they enter young adulthood. Regardless of who it is - whether it’s a sponsor, an older sibling, a coach, or a big brother from their fraternity - at this transitional moment in our lives, it’s crucial to know that someone has our back and can guide us as navigate real-world problems on our own.
And now….our vibes this week 🔮
📚 What we’re reading
‘It’s causing them to drop out of life’: how phones warped Gen Z, politico
Women are getting off birth control amid misinformation explosion, washington post
🎶 What we’re listening to
What if your best friend is your soulmate? radio atlantic
💡 One last thought
THANKS FOR READING!
If you found this valuable, this is your sign✌️ to send this to parents or young people who can relate to the feelings we’re having this week so we can make sure they know they’re not alone. Sharing is caring 😎
We’re in this to collaborate and support. Please feel free to reach out to us:
If you’re passionate about changing the narrative in the industry.
If you’re a parent who has a child in treatment, we’re happy to answer any of your burning questions and share our experience in treatment and with transitioning out!